Done

So, I have decided to let the emotion of happiness take over instead of happiness. I'm about to experience a new culture, hopefully redevelop my love of teaching, travel all over Korea, and be with the one person I have wanted to be with every day for the past 3 years. Yes, I am going to miss everyone, and yes I feel like I have missed majority of my brother and sisters life. However, I am gaining so much, and losing nothing except proximity and that will always be a problem. I'm young, black, intelligent, open-minded, and in love! :) All smiles from now on!

Wearing down on Me

I am definitely starting to feel some kind of way about moving. They just moved up my date from the 28 to the 14. Which means instead of leaving the 20th I have to leave to be there by the 11th the latest. While I am extremely excited and overwhelmed in a good way, I have this feeling I can't shake. This feeling of loss. I have lost so much time with my brother and sister and I have pretty much only been around through phone contact. I feel guilty for leaving honestly. Guilty for trying to live and do the things I want. I feel like I'm gaining and losing at the same time. My heart is heavy with pain and joy. I can't really express it because I have to hold it together. Can't let anyone know that I'm scared shitless about EVERY aspect of this thing. If I'm not sure how the hell can anyone else be? I keep trying to exhale and feel that release but its not happening. I'm not feeling that shift back to equilibrium. Maybe I won't feel ok until I am already there and have gotten all my tears out. Once I'm there and settled and not anticipating the dreaded departure that is sure to take a toll on me both here in phoenix and at home with my family. I am so hurt and I can't talk about it with anyone. I can't let myself cry about it and this is the first time I've really delved into it mentally. I don't really know what to do but this feeling is getting worse as time goes by (as to be expected). So where does that leave me?
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PACKING

So Today I started packing AGAIN! Round 3 has proved to be much more productive than 1 and 2. I was on a serious mission to throw everything away. So far I am down to 2 bags and a carry on. By the time I leave, I am hoping for the same amount of luggage, but without being over packed. One bag is 30 lbs, and the other bag is 60. Gonna have to do some revamping! GRRRRR! I just want to be done with this packing already. My buddy is coming to get my bedroom set so at least that is a done deal! Round 4 happens next week!!!! Whooo!!!
Other things... I being my intense diet again tomorrow. That means that for 23 days I am going to be focused on eating the right amount of calories and not ingesting any sugars, carbs, or oils. I'm ready. I have about 50 pounds to lose before I am at my goal weight. YES! The need for shopping in Korea is super important! Must have clothes! Even though I wont be able to drink, or even really eat, at my own going away party, or any of the other parties I am going to be involved in, I am still ready to do this! Go me!

This week is all about packing, cleaning up my classroom, throwing away crap, paying off Arizona stuff, and of course thinking about getting my Visa and hoping it goes well. While packing, I found this wonderful picture of me cheerleading!
Cute huh? I'd love to get back to THAT size. Lets try it! I'm also trying to let my hair grow back. All that stress and color ruined it so I am just going to keep letting it breathe. Lets see what happens. Ok, Back to Sci Fi

Shay

Foiled again

Yesterday I left home super excited. I had a handful of documents that were going to seal the deal for my Visa and my job. I drove to school on cloud 9 and ran to Castenzio's room to tell him the good news. "I finally have everything I need". After the horrid issue with Arizona not giving background checks, the FBI taking 13 weeks, and having to pay Berea College the money I owed them for transcripts, I finally had all documents in hand; Kentucky Background check, transcripts, Bachelors Degree, Masters degree, andddddddddd my contract! Whooo.

Fast forward to 8:30am before the middle school field trip. Castenzio comes to my room to see all of my documents and Christina comes in to tell me about the Suns game last night and how they did the wave like 9 times. In my excitement about all that was about to happen I decide to do the wave too! WHOOOOOOOOO... And I'll be dammed if I didn't spill coffee all over my background check. URGH!! Ok, not the actual check, but the apostilled seal that proves that my background check is official.
Ok, Its just the top but seriously??? Can I get a break? I hope they take it because this whole thing is getting really out of control. Is it that bad??? The seal is perfectly intact so maybe I am overreacting. Who knows. I'm just ready to arrive in my new home and settle in. Just when I thought everything was looking up... Foiled again!

With You The Force Is

So I watched starwars this weekend and I decided to rock the Princess Leia buns! The students and the boyfriend liked them. Made me look young. I like it.

Update:

I have all my material for my Visa and I'm going to be sending off tomorrow! Yay! Its coming together very well. Taking my students on a field trip tomorrow so I need REST tonight! Damn kids are gonna be all over the Science Center tomorrow. Lord give me strength!
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Hmmm

To hair or not to hair in Korea.... That is the questions

The End is near!

I am so excited about moving!!! I leave here on May 30 and I leave for Korea on June 20. My other blog site was wayyyyyy to full of drama right now so I am quitting them. I want simplicity for my Traveling blog. I will keep that one for all the crazy random things that come to my mind. So here I am, all ready to start blogging about my year teaching English in South Korea and being with my love. I cant wait. I spent this weekend packing and cleaning. I am sure I will be done by the second week in May and all ready for my going away party. Ready....Set.....Korea!