Saturday, July 30, 2011


Hello Darlings,

If you are here to follow my rantings about life in general you don't need to worry.

My fitness, recipe and weight loss blog is now up and running.  Please head over and give it a follow!

You Wont be sorry!


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Friday, July 29, 2011

My relationship with food

I was watching the movie "Limitless" today and there was a scene where the guy had just purchased a huge bacon egg and cheese bagel before he walks in and sees his friend shot in the chest.  He immediately drops all the bags in his hands and my first thougt was :

He should DEFINITELY pick up that bagel and get to eating!!!

Sick right?  Right now I am exactly .5 lbs of the way to my first major weight loss goal ! Can you believe it?  After all this time!  Finally about to hit the goal...but all I can think about is food.  I go on Pinterest and look up all the foods I cant wait to eat when I get off this diet. I think about the kind of foods that I want to cook, throwing dinner parties, and eating out whenever I want.  Is this pathetic?  I don't think so.

Eating is a wonderful thing!!  I have noticed that the things I crave have changed drastically.  I no longer just want the burger and fries, or the big ass bag of potato chips, but I have started to crave more healthy yet savory foods.

Im craving things like baked Zucchini and eggplant Lasagne.  Like chicken teriyaki and BLT's with slow roasted tomatoes.  YUM!

So I am glad to say that while I am still completely in love with food, and I want to eat it all the time lol, I also notice that my eating habits and desires have changed for the better.  YAY FOR PROGRESS!!!

(I still want that damn bagel though)


Saturday, July 23, 2011

Maybe It's Me...

Being new to England, I try to get out as much as I can and being that I don't know anything about the area and I suck at driving, I tend to have to go out with other people.  I am usually such a people person- I can generally get along with anyone.  But on these last few outings I have completely hated the people I went out with, but then I wonder ..."is it me".  

Last weekend I went out with a bunch of children.  They were between 20 and 23 but when you are in the military with no responsibilities, that really subtracts about 2 or 3 years from your maturity age.  Which makes it even worse because while I don't know a specific "maturity age" for myself, I ALWAYS handle my business and I plan everything to the last detail.  Even with the information that the birthday girl herself was only turning 21 I had faith that the alcohol would put the ages a little closer together- How wrong I was.  These people got drunk off their asses, disappeared, we couldn't find the hotel, my boyfriends friend Brian (birthday girls boyfriend and Robs co-worker) ended up ditching as all because the chick thought he was flirting with us and started slapping him around right before she threw up in the limo.  

Can we say RUINED WEEKEND??  Then we had to find our way back to Cambridge.  None of these assholes could even find a ride for us and once we got back to the base, no one was volunteering to take me home "take a taxi"- FUCK YOU ALL.  So I had to call someone...the chick who has only been here for a month was able to get someone to pick us up but they couldn't, how about that shit.  Throughout this whole ordeal I had to play the mommy role, come up with suggestions, make decisions, and get shit done, as always.  By the end of the weekend everyone had gotten a thorough Shaina curse out to take home with them.  

Fast forward to yesterday.  Robs other friend, Freddy, invited me to go out with him and his friend to the mall for some shopping and some Movie watching.  Now I actually  like this dude; he is reliable and seriously full of energy...SERIOUSLY, so I was excited to go out with them.  The day finally arrives and I meet the friend.  she comes in the house and I say my usually happy-go-lucky  "HELLO" and she says nothing- First sign that I wasn't going to like her.  When you walk into a house and you are meeting someone for the first time you should acknowledge them personally when they say hello.  Then 3 minutes later Freddy actually remembers to introduce us and she gives a weak "Hi", so I just nod.  At this point I was still going to try to give her a second chance.  I told myself that I was being too judgemental and I should chill out.  We get in the car and I immediately take the front seat, I wasn't going to but hey, fuck her- establish dominance.  I try to have a conversation or two with her but all she can talk about is her 7 year sex hiatus (she should have killed herself) her stalker ex husband, and how he wont give her custody of her daughter.  

Now I am NOT a monster and that is a sucky situation, but EVERYONE is dealing with shit.  I wasn't going out so I could listen to someone complain and sit there and stare at pictures on their phone all damn day.  Again, I'm not evil, but I also have very little contact with the outside world from my little house in the country and when I do meet people and go out, I want to have FUN.  I want to talk shit about people, laugh, and look fly (I did look fly though).  

I miss my girls.  I haven't had true ride or die girl friends since phoenix (a few in Korea but not really long enough to get to the ride or die point) and since I can't bring my Skype to the bar, maybe I should give up.  Back the the original point, maybe it's me.  I was actually wondering this for a minute.  Am I just too judgemental and hard on the people that I've been meeting?  The answer is HELL NO.  The weekend from hell with all the drunk young people, yea the deserve to be hated.  The chick who did absolutely nothing but complain the whole day and the only time she smiled is when she was laughing at something that she didn't tell us about, yea she deserves to be disliked as well.  So no, it's not me, it's all these other people who SUCK ASS.  

I just want some normal girl friends who are like minded.  Some women who went to college and have aspirations and goals, want to travel, want to keep their bodies healthy and happy, and can sit over a glass of wine and have intelligent conversation that doesn't include or revolve around man bashing.  There has either been drama or complaining on both weekends and I am not up for it.  I need to be uplifted and not have my emotions dragged down because I feel sorry for someone.  

Anyway, I have run my mouth enough.  Sadly, I don't see this changing any time soon so I better just get used to it.  I can just stick it out in the house until Rob comes back and then we can go off and meet new people together.  But at the end of the day, I miss home.  

Thursday, July 14, 2011

AVADA KADAVRA~ Saying Goodbye

This week marks the end of something that I hold near and dear to my heart.  The end of the love affair I've had with the boy beneath the stairs.  The end of my not so silent obsession with finding a way to NOT be a muggle anymore. The end of the sensation I feel knowing that a new one is coming out.  Yes, ladies and gentleman, this week marks the end of Harry Potter.

Let me first start with a small ode to why I love Harry Potter in the first place 
*Que Harry Potter Music NOW*
When I first heard the rave about this book I was immediately intrigued.  I, who loved the Wizard of Oz and basically anything to do with magic, stole the book from my cousin (who we were living with at the time because we were so broke) and read until she came in and snatched it away from me.  Later that day, I begged my parents to buy me the book so I could have it for my very own.  I know what you're thinking, "why didn't you go to the library" well I do not like my books to have a crease in the Spine.  DONT JUDGE ME.  So I was content to wait until we had enough money to spare on my little obsession.  The wait didn't last long and soon I was sitting at the table pounding through Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone in 3 hours.

Enter Crackheadish Obsession--

JK Rowling had definitely found a new cult follower at that point.  I was entranced.  I don't just love it because of the story, but the literary beauty of it as well.  Even back then at the tender age of 14 I had a real respect for the craft of writing.  Not only was the story brilliant and the characters so easy to connect with, Rowling had created an entire world within a world.  The magical world had Classism (mudblood), a different colloquial language, a hierarchy or power, and so many other things that made one actually believe that there really was a Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.  This was easy because most of the followers really wanted it to exist anyway.  I also love that people actually die in the books.  I know that might sound ridiculous, but in real life people die.  It hurts and it sucks but the reality of the series was something else that kept me coming back.

I was able to lose myself in the books at a time when things were not going so well in my real like.  We had just moved to Charlotte and out of my cousins house, money was tight, and stress levels were high.  I guess you could say the books helped me get away from what was happening in my real life.  My parents, who always supported my book or movie obsessions, knew how much I loved it.  For Christmas that year, even though money was tight, I got Harry Potter 2 AND 3!  And yes, I cried.  No matter what, my parents always sacrificed to try to make sure I got the things I wanted, and I guess it helped that it didn't take much to make me happy.  A couple of books and some pretty pens and I am golden.

And that feeling never went away.  With every new book or new movie, I get that intense emotional rush.  Not just a rush of excitement, but also the knowledge of what it stood for all this time.  It was an escape; a place that I could lose myself.  I am the kind of person who feels what characters feel in movies and books.  I get completely invested.  I cry when they are sad, and my heart flutters when they are happy, and I can vividly see the world as they do (which is why I like books better).  It was something I could look forward to.

So this weekend will be the last time I feel that way.  The last book hurt, but at least I still had the rest of the movies.  This is the last movie.  The last time I will stay up all night and get inline for the 12am showing.  The last time I think about what costumes to wear to the movie.  Its Bittersweet but I am excited about letting go.  Its been a wonderful 12 years and I can say that I am ready to say goodbye.  Thank you JK Rowling for giving me friends in a new world, excitement, heartache, and keeping me young.  After all, who even thought I would see the last movie in ENGLAND!  What a great life I lead!

And yes... I'm crying right now...

Monday, July 11, 2011

Weed French Fries

Who knew?  Who the hell knew?  I KNEW...  I've been saying it.

"French Fries are like crack, man"-Shaina circa 1922

But who knew I picked the wrong illegal yet addictive substance to pin my obsession on?  A recent study found that snacks like potato chips and french fries have a marijuana like called Endocannabinoids.   Commence snickering with references to all the terms for weed - cannibus, endo, ect.
I bet you're wondering where the hell I found this picture! ha!

Sounds funny  huh?  Maybe, but to us rehabilitated Carbo addicts it makes a lot of sense.

"My name is Shaina, and I'm a Carbo-holic"~~~HI SHAINA~

"In their study, the Piomelli team discovered that when rats tasted something fatty, cells in their upper gut started producing endocannabinoids. Sugars and proteins, the researchers noted, did not have this effect.

The process starts on the tongue, where fats in food generate a signal that travels first to the brain and then through a nerve bundle called the vagus to the intestines. There, the signal stimulates the production of endocannabinoids, which initiates a surge in cell signaling that prompts the wanton intake of fatty foods, Piomelli said, probably by initiating the release of digestive chemicals linked to hunger and satiety that compel us to eat more."

Well would you look at that shit. I mean that's quite compelling as far as dietary information is concerned.  Granted, we all know that those snacky food suck, but I love to find out the science behind why a Spade is a Spade- especially when I am trying to throw my cards in (if you didn't get that metaphor...)!  The study also mentions that the need to consume fat comes from a primal part of our bodies (as animals) because its needed for proper cell functioning.  In the wild, these fat are not readily accessible, yet for us, it's as easy as picking up the phone.  THIS is what actually leads to obesity. (See original article here)

So not only do these foods taste delicious, are filing, and completely bad for you (those nasty Carbs I mean) they are also laced with crack (crack is my go to drug when I am talking junk, yes, I do know this blog is about mary jane).  Just like Krispy Kreme.  They are out to get me!  #FML

What is your "go to" carb of choice?

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Driving Miss Shaisy

As I muted the tv to listen to the 4th car drive past, I thought to myself "Shaina, he isnt coming back".  He wasn't pulling into the drive way and he hadn't run to the store- he's gone for 2 months and there is nothing you can do about it.  So I got my mind together and set off to take a little trip into town.  

This was my first attempt at driving alone, not to mention that I have only driven to this store once before.  Needless to say I was nervous and continued to pace the floor for at least 20 minutes before I even put my pants on, but I knew I had to get out and attempt the drive before I stayed here and missed him all day.  So I found my pants, put my oatmeal bowl in the wash and popped on the wig before I headed out the door.  

I was amazed to find that I was surprisingly calm and relaxed as I walked towards the car.  I sat down, found the GPS, adjusted the seat to short person status, picked from the sparse collection of cd's (because my mp3 player doesn't work with the Itrip and all Rob had was hard core stuff so I choose the little wayne- lesser of evils if you can imagine), and started off on my way.  I drove out of my neighborhood and I admit, I started feeling a little exhilarated.  

Don't worry, I was still in the driveway 

Here I am, Shay Shay La Shay, driving around in the car that my man left me; leaving from the house we live in together; and shopping for things to make it our own.  I mean, I am still sad in every way because he is gone, but I had to focus on the big picture, and the big picture is this- My life is good.  I have the love of my life, a nice house, a nice car and while things might not be EXACTLY how I want them, they are wonderful.

 "So stop being a cry baby Shaina"

So, what shall I do with my 59 more days?  

Friday, July 8, 2011

Only Bad Witches Are Ugly

Hello Bloggie boos. Missed me?  I know I have been AWOL on blog content but shit has been real in 31 main street Hockwold.  But, good stuff first~~~

We had the BEST anniversary 3 day weekend.  Let's start with Friday.  After I practiced driving (getting better by the way) we picked up some Vodka and Baileys and had some luscious White Russians in the Conservatory.  We hung out at home and stayed up all night listening to and talking about music.  Saturday we got up early and made some sexy breakfast; Eggs, hashbrowns, bacon and toast.  Yum yum!  There is a video of that somewhere I am sure... Anyway, then we went on base and went skating!  AHHH I havent been on skates in years!  At least 5, it was so much fun.  I am sure I would have had even more fun if I was dressed appropriately but hey, I loved it.  Not to mention, ya boy got some moves on those skates... Heeeeeeeeyyyy boooooo.  Later we bought a grill and had lunch.  I had this wonderful Chicken Kabob with fries and ...drum roll... HUMUS!  My new first love.  We came home, watched some "RJ BERGER" and got dressed for a night out but revisited the idea of going over to meet the neighbors.  So nervously, we walked over to the neighbors house and introduced ourselves.  They were sooooooo nice.  I wasnt expecting them to invite us in, feed us wine and rolled ciggys and just kick back with us, but I was glad they did.  Feels good to know I live beside some awesome people.  Anyway, we left there late as hell- maybe 10:30 and then went on a mission to find the seediest and most trifling looking club... and yes we succeeded! HOWEVER!!! On the way there we got pulled over for nothing, but just a warning thankfully.  We hung out there for some hours before stopping by the base for some more alchy and wouldn't you know.... PULLED OVER AGAIN! Lord it was a night of firsts.  And you wont believe it, but on the way home we saw a huge Dalmatian running full speed towards the car.  I mean full gallop in the middle of the road!  We thought we were going to come home to a house on fire, but all was well.  We proceeded to get drunk and profess our love to each other over and over again... On video (and no you can't see it lol).  I just realized that we crossed something else off the list- Make a video!  And boy was it a good one.

Sunday we BBQ-ed and did nothing else.  Sunday we ate.  That was it.  Food!  Burgers, shrimp kabobs, brats, banana bread, chicken.  Jesus it was a lot of food, and we smashed it and fell asleep at like 9 pm!  Awesome huh?  Monday was great though!!!  I got to go and see WICKED!!!! BWAH!!!  It was freaking fantastic!  Something else I can cross off our list of things to do.  We had to rush through dinner but we made it with time to spare and a very teary eyed Shaina got to see the show she has been waiting to see for about 5 years!  It was a great night!

Our grill

Big Ben

So on to the not so awesome stuff.  
Rob is leaving for 2 months to go to Greece.  It sucks big time.  I just got here.  Not coming back until September 1 which means fuck my birthday.  Fuck my life and fuck his job for being so rude.  Yes, I AM a little pissy about it.  So pissy, in fact, that I have refused to even write/talk about it because I dont want to hear anyone's sad fucking pity party.  I am pitiful enough, trust me.  But tomorrow is the day.  Im pretty sure I have been a bitch for most of the week simply because I am sad about the whole thing.  And more things keep coming up to make me even more pissy.  Por ejemplo, we were supposed to stay up all night tonight before he leaves for his flight, but they tell him yesterday that his flight is at 6:50 in the damn am!  The air port is 2 hours away.  You have to be there 2 hours early for international.  That ends our all nighter at about 2 am.  FUCK YOU ITINERARY!

So thats the reason I've been awol and will probably continue to be for a while (unless it have a total opposite effect and I just start writing all the time!).  All is well.  I have come to terms with it.  It sucks, but just like all the other bullshit we go through, there is nothing we can do about it so I have to just get over it, and at the end, we will come back even stronger.  Like a mothereffin PHOENIXLOVE! .  So 2 months of finding random shit to do... here I come.  I know one thing, in 2 months this house will be decked OUT!  He is leaving me the money, the car, and executive rights over this love chalet's decorations.  I can't wait to dig it!  I love him- especially through the hard times.