I practiced French on my Ipod while walking to work but felt no satisfaction. I was in "Don't you dare speak to me" mode and everyone picked up on it. I felt lonely as soon as I opened my eyes, and the only thing I had to look forward to was the fact that I was going to see my Rob tomorrow. That's right...WAS. Right smack in the middle of my day Robert tells me that he has to work this weekend and he will be unable to come see me. Wasn't that the icing on my shitty ass day cake?? Yep. You know what happened right? I sat there staring at the computer screen while the tears just dropped on my desk. Not angry tears, just a sheer disappointment that I could NOT shake. This makes nearly 3 weeks that I wont see him. I could have crawled up and died somewhere. For the rest of the conversation I pulled it together and pretended like all was well, but there really was nothing that he could say to soothe me; I was gone at "I got bad news". To be fair, it wasn't all his fault, the day began as shit and he just added another huge turd. So technically I can't blame him but
Lately I feel really alone. Don't get me wrong, Korea is awesome and I am surrounded by people that I truly like but
Even though I had to force myself with all that I could muster, I worked out when I came home. I gave myself a facial and baked the cookies that I was supposed to bake for my Robert, and I gave them to Ciara. I cleaned a little, did my nails, and now I'm watching another horror movie. So
Tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow will be better.
ID (if you dont know psychological terms)- The id is responsible for our basic drives such as food, water, sex, and basic impulses. It is amoral and selfish, ruled by the pleasure–pain principle; it is without a sense of time, completely illogical, primarily sexual, infantile in its emotional development, and is not able to take "no" for an answer. It is regarded as the reservoir of the libido or "instinctive drive to create"
And my Id is
a muthaf*cker sometimes out of control.
And my Id is