Saturday, July 9, 2011

Driving Miss Shaisy

As I muted the tv to listen to the 4th car drive past, I thought to myself "Shaina, he isnt coming back".  He wasn't pulling into the drive way and he hadn't run to the store- he's gone for 2 months and there is nothing you can do about it.  So I got my mind together and set off to take a little trip into town.  

This was my first attempt at driving alone, not to mention that I have only driven to this store once before.  Needless to say I was nervous and continued to pace the floor for at least 20 minutes before I even put my pants on, but I knew I had to get out and attempt the drive before I stayed here and missed him all day.  So I found my pants, put my oatmeal bowl in the wash and popped on the wig before I headed out the door.  

I was amazed to find that I was surprisingly calm and relaxed as I walked towards the car.  I sat down, found the GPS, adjusted the seat to short person status, picked from the sparse collection of cd's (because my mp3 player doesn't work with the Itrip and all Rob had was hard core stuff so I choose the little wayne- lesser of evils if you can imagine), and started off on my way.  I drove out of my neighborhood and I admit, I started feeling a little exhilarated.  

Don't worry, I was still in the driveway 

Here I am, Shay Shay La Shay, driving around in the car that my man left me; leaving from the house we live in together; and shopping for things to make it our own.  I mean, I am still sad in every way because he is gone, but I had to focus on the big picture, and the big picture is this- My life is good.  I have the love of my life, a nice house, a nice car and while things might not be EXACTLY how I want them, they are wonderful.

 "So stop being a cry baby Shaina"

So, what shall I do with my 59 more days?  

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